Stupid Carving Warnings

Most of this is common sense, but since it appears there are an abundance of people that exist without common sense, these rules are for them. Feel free to contribute some yourself.


  • Never touch a lit flame. It is hot and may burn you.
  • Never put a lit flame in your mouth.
  • Don't get your halloween costume near a flame, typically the materials are thin an combust easily.
  • If you see someone doing any of the above, grab a video camera; you just might win $10,000 on America's Funniest Home Videos.
  • Don't care your pumpkin with a lit flame inside.
  • Ideally use an artifical light source for lighting your pumpkin.
  • Don't injure your hand while cutting the hole in the top of the pumpkin.
  • Don't put your hand in the pumpkin and feel for the knife or saw to come through.
  • Don't use a candle with the lid on.
  • Don't use a tall candle if you made the base of the pumpkin the access point.
  • The pointy end of the knife always goes away from you.
  • Cut away from yourself.
  • If you're going to injure someone, make sure it isn't you.
  • Memorize the number to 911.
  • If something that belongs to you gets cut off, take it with you to the emergency room.
  • Don't leave your lit pumpkin unattended.
  • If your pumpkin looks ugly, claim someone else carved it.
  • If someone else's pumpkin looks really good, claim you carved it.
  • If you don't want someone else's pumpkin to look good, offer to help them.

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